Men And Women:  Understanding Each Other Better In The Workplace

No one would argue the fact that men and women are physically different. Our physical differences are mostly obvious and can be seen and quantified. For example, in the 2024 Olympics held in Paris in July and August, spectators saw male athletes throw the hammer further than female athletes did and run the 100m race in a faster time. This is possible because of male physiology – men usually have greater upper body strength than women and build muscle more easily.  

Less visible is that fact that women have four times as many brain cells (or neurons) that connect the right and left side of their brain, while men’s brains are wired to work from back to front. Simply put, the back of the brain handles perception, and the front of the brain handles action; the left hemisphere of the brain is the seat of logical thinking, while the right side of the brain gives rise to intuitive thinking.  

There is scientifically based evidence that supports the clinical observation that men rely more heavily on their left brain to solve problems – one problem at a time. While women, who have more efficient access to both sides of their brain can focus on more than one problem at a time and to solve problems through multiple activities at a time.1  

How do our brain-related differences play out in our working relationships? 

There are many reasons why one person may not have a good relationship with another in the workplace, but being from different sexes should not be one of them. Positive working relationships between men and women are entirely possible, though problems can arise when men or women assume the opposite sex should think or act the same way they do. 

Here are 2 examples of how male and female colleagues may act differently: 

Processing information 

While men and women usually reach similar conclusions, in general, men and women process information differently.  

• Women: As mentioned, women have greater access to the right hemisphere of their brain. Thus, women tend to process information a more global perspective, being able to simultaneously consider multiple sources of information. Plus, a person’s right brain is commonly viewed as their “emotional radar.” It picks up on information that is felt, perceived, or seen. When processing the nuances of verbal communication, women’s greater access to the right brain makes sense of the qualities of voice such as tone, pitch, volume. They also make sense of facial expressions, gestures, and other body language as part of their information gathering process.  

• Men: While women’s brains are “wired” to work side to side cross left and right hemispheres, men’s brains are wired to work from back to front. Thus, when men are processing information, they will tend to focus one thing at a time, sometimes to the exclusion of all these, analysing specific aspects – particularly those aspects that indicate problems. When it comes being intuitive and reading between the lines, men can access their right brain, but they must actively tune in for the messages it provides. It is easy for most men to ignore what their right brain is telling them.  

Problem solving  

Because of differences in the structure of their brain and make-up of hormones (which act as neurotransmitters) men and women tend to approach problems with similar goals but with different considerations. The outcome may be the same, but their approach and process can be quite different.  

• Women: Women see problems more holistically and are generally more concerned about how problems are solved than merely solving the problem. For them, sharing and discussing a problem presents an opportunity to deepen and strengthen the relationship with their coworker or team. As a result, women are prone to become overwhelmed by perceived or existing complexities and may have difficulty separating their personal experience from problems.  

• Men: For most men, solving a problem presents an opportunity to demonstrate their competence and commitment. They are good at minimising complexities that may exist. Men come to understand and consider problems one piece at a time, following a linear or sequential approach. How the problem is solved is not nearly as important as solving it effectively with the best outcome. They have an enhanced ability to compartmentalise, separating themselves from the problem.  

Instead of men or women immediately considering the opposite sex to be “the inscrutable other” while simultaneously expecting them to be supportive, they should acknowledge their diverse perspectives and strive to gain a better understanding. Here are four things that are useful for men and women to understand when forging a productive working relationship:  

1. Communication styles 

Men generally believe that there should be a clear purpose behind the need to communicate. So, they will keep their communication succinct and on point – speaking with clarity and purpose. Men will share only information that they feel is of vital importance. In contrast, women may use communication to organise the different thoughts which come to their mind. They may talk themselves into clarity. Plus, women express their feelings through communication. For them, communication is an act of sharing through which they strive to strengthen their understanding and rapport with coworkers. In terms of body language, women tend to be highly expressive when they speak while men tend to not show emotion and may come across as calmer.  

2. Gaining understanding 

Another area of difference when communicating is that women usually ask more questions than men. Asking questions typically has a different purpose for men and women. Men normally ask questions for a single reason – to gather information. Women, on the other hand also like to ask questions to show interest in what the other person is saying and to strengthen the relationship. 

3. Ways of listening 

In meetings, men and women have very different ways of listening to someone speak. Research has found that men tend to listen to a speaker by slightly turning away and looking at the different parts of the room. When a man turns away and starts looking at the various parts of the room, a woman who is speaking may think he is not interested in what is being discussed. Women, on the other hand, tend to keep eye contact with the speaker and nod regularly as a sign of approval. 

4. Communicating with employees 

Men and women have quite different ways of managing their employees and giving them orders. Many studies have shown that women tend to be more subtle and inclusive in the way they put things across – even when giving a command – while men speak more directly. A direct communication style does not mean that the speaker is arrogant or dominating. Likewise, a more subtle or accommodating approach does not necessarily mean that the person giving the order lacks confidence or is merely making a suggestion.  

Improving communication between men and women in the workplace takes actively seeking to learn and understand our differences. Neither way of being is better or more desirable for the success of the business than the other. In fact, gender diverse businesses should be looking to create an environment where both male and female employees thrive and look forward to communicating with each other and leverage each other’s strengths. A professional coach can be useful in helping a team gain understanding and find ways for men and women to work together for the good of the team and the company. 

Over to you for sharing your comments and experiences.